• Thou shalt not steal if there is a direct victim.
• Thou shalt not worship Pop Idols or follow Lostprophets.
• Thou shalt not take the names of Johnny Cash, Joe Strummer, Johnny Hartman, Desmond Dekker, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix or Syd Barrett in vain.
• Thou shalt not think any male over the age of 30 that plays with a child that is not their own is a paedophile. Some people are just nice.
• Thou shalt not read NME.
• Thou shalt not stop liking a band just because they've become popular.
• Thou shalt not question Stephen Fry.
• Thou shalt not judge a book by its cover.
• Thou shalt not judge Lethal Weapon by Danny Glover.
• Thou shalt not buy Coca-Cola products.
• Thou shalt not buy Nestlé products.
• Thou shalt not go into the woods with your boyfriend's best friend, take drugs and cheat on him.
• Thou shalt not fall in love so easily.
• Thou shalt not use poetry, art or music to get into girls' pants. Use it to get into their heads.
• Thou shalt not watch Hollyoaks.
• Thou shalt not attend an open mic and leave as soon as you've done your shitty little poem or song you self-righteous prick.
• Thou shalt not return to the same club or bar week in, week out just 'cause you once saw a girl there that you fancied that you're never gonna fucking talk to.
• Thou shalt not put musicians and recording artists on ridiculous pedestals no matter how great they are or were.
• Thou shalt give equal worth to tragedies that occur in non-English speaking countries as to those that occur in English speaking countries.
• Thou shalt remember that guns, bitches and bling were never part of the four elements and never will be.
• Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music.
• Thou shalt not pimp my ride.
• Thou shalt not scream if you wanna go faster.
• Thou shalt not move to the sound of the wickedness.
• Thou shalt not make some noise for Detroit.
• When I say "Hey" thou shalt not say "Ho".
• When I say "Hip" thou shalt not say "Hop".
• When I say, he say, she say, we say, make some noise - kill me.
• Thou shalt not quote me happy.
• Thou shalt not shake it like a Polaroid picture.
• Thou shalt not wish your girlfriend was a freak like me.
• Thou shalt spell the word "Pheonix" P-H-E-O-N-I-X, not P-H-O-E-N-I-X, regardless of what the Oxford English Dictionary tells you.
• Thou shalt not express your shock at the fact that Sharon got off with Brad at a club last night by saying "Izzit".
• Thou shalt think for yourselves.